You know, I feel that I have been reviewing too many good pastas recently. It's just that, I don't want things to get too easy. If I review all of the good pasta, then I'll be left with all of the bad ones. Now that I have started this blog, I have been going back and finding new pastas to read and review. It's amazing the sheer amount of good pastas directly under the surface. It's like digging in your back yard, and finding a cooler filled with Big Red. Naturally, there are plenty of bad pasta under the surface. Waiting, watching, and wasting away. If you dig in the ground, you're going to find a lot of dirt before you find gold. So let's dig up a big pile of bad pasta, raw and stinking, and let's get cracking, this, is Sucked In.
Let's talk about mental illness, in terms of storytelling. Mental Illness, when used properly, can be the most horrifying thing on the planet. It feels so...real. The thought that there are some people out there, who are mentally unsound enough to that scary. Case in point, let's look at Silence of the Lambs. A classic film, and as scary as watching paint dry. IN HELL. Not going too deep into this topic, what makes a story about a lunatic good, is subtlety. What drives it, is the thought that that extremely attractive women you've just married, might just drag you down into the basement, and violate you with a screwdriver.
"Sucked In" defenestrated that idea. Then beat it with a shovel, just to be sure.
Nothing. NOTHING about this story is subtle. Absolutely nothing. It flat out tells you that the main character is off of his meds, or sold them off on the street to fuel his Magic the Gathering addiction. Everything about this story is just...wrong. But hey, that's why we have websites like this, so we can review these horrid pastas.
Initial Thoughts: What the hell did I just read? The first time I read this...thing, I had to go back and read it again, just to try and wrap my head around it. Needless to say, I wasn't successful. I still can't grasp the true form of this pasta's attack.
Summary: Forgive me if this a bit disjointed, but just read it, and you will know of my pain. So, this guy...who is explicitly insane, is flailing around on his computer. He tells his "friends", that he has to add a pony to his collection. So he kills ponies, and stuffs them and adds them to a collection of other ponies. But, surprise, surprise, it wasn't a pony at all. It was a human. AND THEN A SKELETON POPPED OUT.
Reaction: What was this author going for? I can guess, and I'm probably right. The thing about short pastas, is that they are made for a twist ending. It is meant to be short, but sweet. I think what the author was going for was just another short but sweet story. The problem was that he didn't understand how they worked. Another problem is, he tells us waaay too much. He leaves nothing to the imagination. If it even is a he.
Analysis: Please Mr. West, no more today.
Rating: 0/5
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